Give aways galore!

It's a happy first birthday to the UK dares blog. Previously known as The Speshals, to celebrate our first year and move into our second year, we have moved to a new blog, given ourselves a bit of a makeover and a new name too.

Plus we have not one but TWO wonderful prizes but you need to be quick to take part! The very talented Cheryl Johnson is running an online creative photography course and we have one subscription for that course as well as a one month subscription to The Design Collective online scrapbooking classes. The winner will be chosen by random draw from all the comments that are left on the relevant post over at our new home.

We have gone for a circles theme for our inspiration this week and a sneak peek of my page is here. We always love to see how our theme has inspired you, so please remember to let us know if you have played along. Even better if you can link to your own creation, after all that is why we have given ourselves the new name Collectively Yours, because we want everyone to feel that they can join in the fun with us!



As well as this giveaway on the dares blog, we are also running one on our Design Collective blog to celebrate National Scrapbooking Day. For the chance to win a one month subscription to The Design Collective AND a goody box of stash, just leave your comment on our blog over there (again the winner will be by a random draw). And if you are a subscriber for the current month, don't forget to log into the forums and check out all the prize challenges we have got running for the weekend!

I've had to come back and edit in cos I have just realised this is my 100th post on my blog SO cos I am in that sort of mood, I will run my own random draw from all people that leave a comment on here too. But not any old comment, nope I want you to tell me a joke and note that the cheesier the better (I love school boy humour btw!) It will be a goody box of stash (and not any old junk that I have lying around either, I will include some luvverly stuff that will probably pain me to parcel up :D) So, jokes on this post by midnight Monday British Summer Time :) But please remember to keep them publishable and also include a way for me to get back in touch with you if your name is drawn as the winner.

26 comments:

Sue said...

LOL
Ok just a small joke:


Q: How two Psychiatrist greet each other?

A: You are fine. How am I?

Anonymous said...

Happy 100th post Suzanne

What's brown and sticky?

A stick!!!


Very **groan*** but it makes me giggle.

Love Ginger

Annette said...

!giggle! Trust my sister.....
Here's a chuckle from me:

Why did the jazz musician like the wooden board?
Because it had a nice groove in it!

Happy centeniel xx

valj said...

i have a wierd sense of humour and I always giggle when i think of this one..........

What do you call a fly without any wings?????

A walk !!!!

Sorry ***blush***

Anonymous said...

Why did the rubber chicken cross the road?

Because he wanted to stretch his legs!!

Happy 100th post anniversary :)

Hugs!

Tracy P

Anso said...

Not good at jokes...chessy or not LOL! But how about this one:

Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent.

Take care :)

Anso

Andrea said...

I am terrible at jokes but I giggle at this every time.

What do you call a 3 legged donkey?
A wonkey!!

Congratulations on 100 posts Suzanne

Suzanne said...

Q: Why don’t oysters give to charity?

A: Because they’re shellfish.

Hope you are having a great weekend! Are you counting the days until SAGA??

Clare said...

yay 100 posts! my rubbish joke is:

what do you call a man with a seagull on his head

Cliff!


(told you it was rubbish!!)
Clare
xxxx

Scrapdolly said...

Congratulations on your 100th post

Blogger hates me so won't let me sign in properly

I was reading a book about the person who invented scrapbook glue the other day.
I couldn't put it down.

Deborah Duck said...

Congrats on the posts!

I have a cat called Minton.

When he eats my shuttlecocks I say to him: "Bad Minton"

(makes me laugh every time LOL)

Debbie S

Beth said...

Happy 100

did you hear about the cannibal who was expelled from school?

He was buttering up his teacher.


Mommy, Mommy! Daddy's running down the street!
Shut up and step on the gas!

Em said...

Can't believe Ginge stole my best joke. How about...

What's white, fat and heavy, and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you?

A refridgerator!

joanna said...

Happy 100th post, Suzanne :D

OK, here's a couple of my faves:

Q: What do you call a pig with three eyes?

A: A Piiig


Q: What's pink and hard?

A: A pig with a flick knife...


Q: Why was the baby ant so confused?

A: Because all of his uncles were ants!


Q: What do cops use to arrest pigs?

A: Ham-cuffs!

*groan*

xxx

Heather said...

Wetting myself laughing here at the madness LMAO!

Here goes:

Two fish swim into a concrete wall. The one turns to the other and says, "Dam!"

You asked for it ;)

minerva said...

A man and his wife were having an argument about who should brew the coffee each morning.

The wife said, "You should do it, because you get up first, and then we don't have to wait as long to get our coffee".

The husband said, " You are in charge of the cooking around here and you should do it, because that is your job, and I can just wait for my coffee."

Wife replies, "No you should do it, and besides it is in the Bible that the man should do the coffee."

Husband replies, " I can't believe that, show me."

So she fetched the Bible, and opened the New Testament and shows him at the top of several pages, that it indeed says:

"HEBREWS"

minerva said...

Two peanuts walk into a bar.
One was a salted.

What do you call a fish with one eye?
fsh

oh I know but it is late...

Sarah aka Gertie said...

PSML laughing at these!

Happy 100th post :-D

naf joke but Lana keeps telling it me....

Why did the boy take a pencil to bed?

So he could draw the curtains.

pants I know!!

Sam Fenton said...

What do tourists use to get around the beach?

Taxi Crabs!

I know.. terrible..

Debbie said...

2 monkeys get into the bath.

'Ooh, ooh aah aah' (monkey noise) says one monkey.

'Well put some more cold in then' say the other!

Maria said...

Congratulations on your 100th post.

The girlie wirlies favourite jokes are.

What do you call a girl with a tile on her head?

Ruth

What is white and if it fell out of a tree would kill you?

A fridge

Pretty awful but they like them xxx

Jaffers said...

Ok, since Ginge and Val stole my favourites..

How can you tell if there’s an elephant hiding in your fridge?
There’s footprints in the butter.

Or

What do you call a spider with no legs?
A raisin…

jo said...

Whay does Edward Woodward have so many letter D's in his name?

Because Ewar Woowar just doesn't sound right!!

PMB said...

Congrats on your 100th post!

How do you kill a circus?

Go for the juggler

*groan*

Loving your blog!

Paula

Misty said...

Ok, I admit - I couldn't think of ANY jokes AT ALL - so I did what any resourceful girl would and looked one up on the internet. This one is publishable - I THINK - and it made me laugh - I hope it makes you laugh too.

A kilted Scotsman was walking down a country path after finishing off a considerable amount of whisky at a local pub. As he staggered down the road, he felt quite sleepy and decided to take a nap, with his back against a tree.

As he slept, two young lasses walked down the road and heard the Scotsman snoring loudly. They saw him, and one said, "I've always wondered what a Scotsman wears under his kilt."

She boldly walked over to the sleeping man, raised his kilt, and saw what nature had provided him at his birth.

Her friend said, "Well, he has solved a great mystery for us, now! He must be rewarded!" So, she took a blue ribbon from her hair, and gently tied it around what nature had provided the Scotsman, and the two walked away.

Several minutes later, the Scotsman was awakened by the call of nature, and walked around to the other side of the tree to relieve himself. He raised his kilt...and saw where the blue ribbon was tied. After several moments of bewilderment, the Scotsman said...

"I dinna know where y'been lad...but it's nice ta'know y'won first prize!"

Bex said...

OOh you want naff?

OK I can do naff lol (Congrats on the posts btw!)
SO .......

What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground Beef

OK perhaps not that naff!

love bex